Blast Off
by Mayuna
Summary: Ed and Al spend the night at Roys apartment. Non yaoi no pairings


_This was in a collection of drabbles but they are not doing so well so I've decided to split my one shots up to maybe get more people to read them because they are good. Least I think they are….._

**Blast Off**

The fact that Roy Mustang had a previous engagement that night didn't seem to deter the trigger happy blonde as she pointed her standard military pistol at his temple.

"The barracks are full so the Elric's have no where to stay there fore I think it would be in their best interest if they were to stay with you Colonel sir." Hawkeye suggested as the barrel clicked ominiously. Roy sighed closing his eyes feeling defeated.  
"Why do I have to put them up? Al, fine but full metal? I can't even imagine what my apartment will look like come morning." He said pouting. So it came to pass that Roy accustomed to going home alone, at least at such an early hour, had in tow Edward and Alphonse Elric. Roy dropped his keys on a table next to the door and plopped down on his couch. He closed his eyes as one of them shut the door and felt their eyes on him as he rested his.  
"So as of right now we're off the clock right?" Ed asked mischeif clearly in his voice. Roy nodded his head slowly.  
"Basically..." Roy said softly. He could picture in his head the slick smile as it crossed Ed's face and the desperate glances from his younger brother pleading with him not to do anything rash.  
"Alright then bastard colonel. I'd like to let you know what I think about you." Ed said clearing his throat. Roy cracked an eye open watching as Edward took out a folded piece of paper from his jacket pocket and opened it up.

"What's that?" Roy asked taking in noting as Alphonse held his hands to his helmet slowly shaking it from side to side in disbelief.  
"What I think of you." Ed stated innocently.  
"You made a list?" Roy questioned cocking an eyebrow at the younger alchemist. Ed smirked.  
"Number one, you are a bastard. Number two, you are an egotistical glorified pyromaniac. Number three, all you care about is a damn promotion. Number four..." Roy cut him off with a loud side.

"I'm going to shower. The sofa's a bed so you can pull it out if you want. See ya' in the morning." He stated standing up and stretching yawning in the process and walking down the hall. Three hours later and Ed lay pouting on the sofa bed. He stared at the ceiling thinking about his list. He hadn't even gotten to the best part and the bastard had cut him off.  
'Yet another thing to add to the list.' He thought as he turned over. Al had left to take a walk assuring Ed that he would be back soon once again triggering Ed's guilt.

'He must get so bored at night when I'm asleep. If I could I'd stay up to keep him company but...what's that weird smell?' Ed wondered as he sat up and peered down the short hallway that ended with a closed door. Ed stepped onto the floor and walked as quietly as he could to the door that belonged to the colonel's bed room. The light was on he could see so the bastard was still awake and the smell was definately coming from his room. Ed got down on his hands and knee's peering underneath the door frame only being able to see the bed spread that hung to the floor. Ed stood up and actually pondered going to back to bed and falling asleep. A wicked smile cross his face as he clapped his hands together and pressed them to the door. Roy at first in his current state thought he was seeing things as his door dissapeared and there stood Ed Elric before he remembered through some haze that Ed could transmute without a circle and he just transmuted his door possibly into the wall.

"What the hell is that nasty smell." Ed said taking in Roy's half lidded look. He held what looked like a ciggarette, a really big ciggarette.  
"Full metal? Get out of my room." Roy said lazily blinking his eyes a few times. Ed cocked an eye brow and placed his hands on his hips walking closer to investigate.  
"What is that?" He asked his eyes watering over as the smoke burned his throat. Roy looked at it for a moment then back at Edward an evil smile crossing his face.  
'Should I...this is the opportunity I've been waiting for. Why not we only live once.' Roy thought.

"Oh this? It's nothing really just something to relieve stress, calm the nerves that type of thing. Wanna try?" He asked holding it out to him. Ed looked at it curiously feeling uneasy at the colonel's tone of voice as well as the weird look he was giving him as if he were offering him a poisoned drink.

"It's understandable." Roy stated taking a drag. "After all I would expect someone of your stature to turn this down. He said exhaling in Ed's direction. That was the nerve to hit.  
"WHO ARE YOU CALLING SO SHORT THEY'D GET LOST IN ALL THE SMOKE!" Ed yelled walking forward and grabbing it out of Roy's hands. His mother had always worn him not to take candy from strangers and Roy Mustang was about as strange as they came but he couldn't let the bastard get the better of him. Ed brought it to his lips and inhaled choking and sputtering out smoke his first try but the second was easier not as easy as the third though.

Al walked in the door and heard laughing from the direction of the colonel's room.

"That's not funny. You...you don't understand it's so bright in here and the music was playing. My heart was going dun, dun, dun, dun to the music and then it stopped! Oh my god it stopped my heart!" Ed's frantic yells came from the room. Al walked briskly in the room and took in the sight of Edward sprawled out on the colonel's bed his hair hanging in his face like a curtain that partly concealed it. The colonel sat in a chair next to the bed laughing so hard his face was bright red.

"You idiot full metal. The music didn't stop your heart, the evil witch did with her cursed magic." He said his expression becoming serious as he clenched his hand into a fist.  
"Ummmm, is there cause for concern here?" Al asked cautiously. Both Roy and Ed looked in his direction noticing he had just walked in and stared their eyes hazy as if they were drugged. Ed suddenly jumped up bouncing off the bed and falling to the floor.  
"Brother! What's wrong with you?" Al asked picking Ed up off the floor.

"Al my...my body it's so numb...I can't feel anything. Nothing! This..this is...hey...hey...you know I was thinking and we should ummmmmm..." Ed said blinking his eyes a few times as he clung to Alphonse's arm.  
"We should what?" Al asked softly. "What?" Ed asked him confused. "What should we do?" Al replied. Ed stared at him.  
"I don't know what should we do Al?" He asked. Al glared at Roy whom sat in his chair staring placidly at his hands.  
"What did you do to him?" Al ordered. Roy looked up at him.  
"Do to him?" He asked confused. "And your another one. What's going on with the two of you?" Al asked. Roy smiled widely.  
"To be blunt." He said laughing harder as the last word escaped his lips. "We're stoned." He said. Al stared at him.  
"Stoned, as in high?" Al asked irritated. Roy shook his head smirking.  
"Yep! Off our asses." He replied. Al picked his brother up and walked out of the room trying to calm him down.

The next day Roy sat as usual at his desk with a mountain of paperwork. He stared at it sighing heavily. Ed had woken up normal for the most part with no after effects and left. Al had remained silent and refused to look at Roy to which he shrugged off. 'It was just a little harmless fun.' He thought as his office door slammed open to reveal a clearly aggitated blonde. Hawkeye slammed the door behind her locking it.  
"So I got a call at about three a.m. saying that you got Edward Elric so blasted that he barely even knew who he was." She stated sweeping the paperwork off his desk and getting out her gun. Roy stated at her unaffected by this display as she set the gun down. He smiled reaching into his pocket.  
"So I thought to myself that that must mean your running a little low." She stated producing a small package as Roy forked over the money.


End file.
